Jesus is the reason for my existence. I tried to choose between being a bum or a musician, but then I realized they're the same thing. I'm addicted to coffee and Owl City. My purpose in life is to be all things to all people to lead some of them to Christ, and to love everyone to the hilt. I want to show you kindness like you've never seen before. I want to write a song for you. I wanna feel alive forever after.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
A passengers seat,had never looked so good to me...<3
Well anyways,I have wonderful news.People have been starting to notice the way I've been changing.I've been more outgoing lately,and brave,and a person most people would enjoy knowing.
I am quite happy with what I am turning into.I guess I'm growing up.Holy hell,I never thought it would happen,I don't know whether to be scared or excited.But I've decided I wanna still be a kid as I start growing up,so I will never lose the fun childish side of me.However,I will give up the immature,foolish side of me.Care to hear some of the lovely compliments I've gotten?
Danny(my youth pastor who I love and respect very much) said to my mother:Wow!Christina's really getting out there,she's so different.She can preach now.She surprised me so much on Wednesday.
Judy(my wonderfully happy friend) said to me:you sang so beautifully up there tonight,I never would of guessed you had that in you.And when you preached,I would of never thought you could do that.Keep on smiling darling.
Hearing things like that are what makes life worth living.I always wanted to be someone that people would respect and look up to,but I never was.I was always just,the shy girl who always smiled.Or people thought I was stuck up when I was just shy.But now I'm very different.
And also,I got some lovely advice from my friend Tyler,about the guy I like.I spilled out everything to Tyler and how I was so afraid to tell the guy I like,that I like him or even give him hints.Well let me tell you,Tyler is just simply amazing at advice.Yesterday when I saw the guy I like,I talked to him a little bit.And I ended up needing a ride home where I was at,so I went over to the guy I like(I guess I'll call him bdg) and some other guy.And I said,can someone give me a ride home?And bdg asked,how far away do you live?And I replied,just about a mile.And he said,I'll take ya darling.So I went over to my friend Billy and then Billy asked me,well did you ask him to dance?And I said,no but he's gonna give me a ride home now.And Billy was like,that's even better high five!So we enjoyed the lovelyness of a high five and my happiness.So a few minutes later,bdg said it was time to go.We walked out to his car,and he opened my door for me and closed it.What a sweetheart.Then he asked me what kind of music I listened to,and I told him country,and he put a country music radio station on.He talked to me a little bit about random things and I was extremely happy.We made it to my house way too soon and I said,well hey do you ever come down here other then on Mondays?And he said,no actually I don't,I live about 20 minutes from here.And I said,oh are you up in Canton?And he replied yes.I said well I'm up there a lot for band practice and stuff.And he was like oh that's awesome,we'll have to get together sometime and get some extra practice in,tell your parents we'll be stealing you some days other then Mondays real soon.And I smiled and said ok.I didn't want to get out of his car but I knew I had too.I apologized for making him go out of his way to take me home,and he said oh it wasn't too far.I finally said bye,and he said see ya next week darling.And let me say,that was the most amazing car ride of my life!He is such a sweetheart,and good looking,and amazing.Oh and I forgot to mention,a song came on the radio that we both knew,and we were singing it together.It was nice.I had been too shy for about a whole month to ask him if he came down here often,and I finally did it.Wow.I know I have more to do too.It can't end there.I have to get somewhere with him.
Tyler got a nice thank you,for his wonderful advice too.I'm going to start a thing called "Ask Tyler" where people send me emails asking for advice,and me and Tyler help give it.Need advice?Send your problem to my email : secretbolivargrl@aol.com . I'll post advice either in these blogs,if that's ok with you,or I'll email it back to you.Whichever,and it can be anonymous.
Ok!That being said,I think I'll put some quotes and some more random stuff about how I'm feeling lately.
Forgive me if I st-stutter
From all of the clutter in my head
Cuz I could fall asleep in those eyes
Like a water bed
Do I seem familiar, I've crossed you in hallways
a thousand times, no more camouflage
I want to be exposed, and not be afraid to fall.
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
And cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
You always want what you can't have
But I've got to try
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you I will
For you I will
For you-Teddy Geiger.
This is the story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done & Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that, because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realised that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody, when Nobody did what Anybody could of done.
but love, I've come to understand,
is more than three words mumbled
at the end of a goodbye. love is sustained by
action, a pattern of devotion in the
things we do for each other every day.
Shes a daydreamer. Everyone can see that.
But what they don't see, is her dreams.
You pile up enough tomorrows, and you'll
find you are left with nothing but a lot of empty
yesterdays. I don't know about you, but I'd
like to make today worth remembering.
--» Harold Hill, the Music Man
Love; an attempt to change a piece
of the dream world into reality.
What you see depends on what you're looking for.
Life is 10% of what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it.
What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
Do more than belong: participate. Do more than care: help. Do more than believe: practice. Do more than be fair: be kind. Do more than forgive: forget. Do more than dream: work.
Don't frown because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
How different our lives are when we really know what is deeply important to us, and keeping that picture in mind, we manage ourselves each day to be and to do what really matters most.
Well,I think that's all the quotes for now.I used to have a quote,that I made myself,"You foolish people with your hopes held so high,only bound to be disappointed"-Me.That was a very dumb quote.:D
Anyways,God has been blessing me more and more everyday.I haven't been this happy...I remember when I thought I loved someone,now I know I was wrong about that too.I still haven't loved someone either(I mean in the way of dating and relationships)I'm not worrying too much about it.I will find someone in time.I really like bdg though,hopefully I get my chance.
-Christina aka Wolf.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Shining stars and Boulevards ©

Chapter one.
I walked down the deserted rode just like every other night.
Except tonight was different,the air was cold and crisp,and the streetlights shone on the wet pavement.I felt chills wash over me and zipped up my jacket.The stars shone brightly two stars trying to out twinkle each other.I laughed,thinking how us people are just like those stars.
Always trying to outdo each other.I'd been lonely for a long time,always wishing to have someone to join me on my walks.But after a certain amount of time I got over it.
This was the one time I could really be alone,and think.I made my way to the turn which would lead me down to the old ballpark that I adored.The wind picked up rustling some leaves,but it felt somewhat nice on that summer night.I examined the ballpark,and remembered some fun times I had there,just walking and laughing with friends.Things were so different now.I sat down on the bleachers and looked back up to the stars.In all their beauty,I sat breathless.One went shooting across the sky,"I might as well go ahead and make a wish,even though it's useless" I muttered to myself."I wish,that someway,somehow,someone is out there thinking of me,my one true love and wishing to find me.I would give anything for him."My thoughts were interrupted when a car drove by,making me forget what I was doing for a good few seconds.I picked myself up off of the bleachers,and walked home admiring the romance of this moment,and how lovely it would be if I had someone to share it with.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
A Servants Heart ©
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.Philippians 4:12-13
So,if we follow God,why do bad things happen to us anyways?Wasn't it supposed to get easier?Nope.That was never promised.But God can help make things easier if you pray and ask for it.It's not all gonna be easier though,just because you believe in him.Most cases it gets harder but in the end it is worth it.Just hang in there kiddo.
We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God,those who have been called according to his plan.Romans 8:28
And why do relationships that we think are perfect keep falling apart?All these breakups and divorces with people who thought they were madly in love.Well,shall we see?
1If I speak in the tonguesa]">[a] of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,b]">[b] but have not love, I gain nothing.
4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.1.Love is patient.-
Some people aren't patient with their signifacint other,problem one.We should learn to be patient and understanding with each other.
2.Love is kind.-
Pretty obvious ey?
3.It does not envy.-
Indeed,the green envy eyes,not too good in a relationship.What,you say,would you envy in your signifacint other?Maybe they have a friend,whom you are jealous of..say,one that you think could steal them from you?
4.It does not boast,it is not proud.-
Please don't brag(:
5.It is not rude.-
Another obvious,but still very important.
6.It is not self seeking.-
This one is extremely important,you can't love yourself so much that you have to always come first,before the one you say you love.
7.It is not easily angered.-
Aha!!We need to learn,to not let the sun go down on our anger.Be patient with each other and talk about it.Sure we all make each other angry some times but we need to learn to not get so steamed up over certain things.
8.It keeps no record of wrongs.-
Ah,this one is extremely important.Say the one you love,makes a major mistake and really regrets it.And every time you fight or get in an argument,you pull that one up and remind them of that mistake and make them feel like crap.That's a major no-no.
9.Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.-
I don't understand this one too much.I'll get back at you,I mean I know it's obvious too.
10.It always protects.-
It does.
11.Always trusts.-
This is one most couples have trouble with.If you don't trust each other,you can't have a successful relationship.
12.Always hopes.-
Always hopes,for the rainbow after the rain,that you can make it through and come out standing strong together.
13.Always perseveres.-
Always.
Love never fails.-
That is the one thing love doesn't do,so if you say you love each other,but keep failing each other,it's not love.
Beautifully said,straight from the bible and my trying,limited knowledge.
(:
And do not be conformed to this world,but be transformed by the renewing of your mind,so that you may prove what the will of God is,that which is good and acceptable and perfect.Romans 12:2
So here we go,do not be like the world.What you see going on out there,sex,drugs,drinking,and so on and so forth.Don't be like the others.But be transformed,be changed...By a change of mind,change of thoughts.Be different and see how things turn around.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20 - Do you not know that your body is a temple of the holy spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own. You were bought at a price. Therefore, honor God with your body.
-Purity.
Psalm 139:13-14 - For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
16 - your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.Isaiah 40:31
I love this verse.^^^^
There are tears from the saints
For the lost and unsaved
We're crying for them come back home
All your children stretch out their hands
and pick up the crippled man
Father we will lead them home
Sinners reach out your hands
Children in Christ you stand.
We who were called to be your people,
Struggling sinners and thieves
were lifted from the ashes
and out came the song of the redeemed.
Your mercy brings me to my knees.
Oh, the beauty of your majesty.
On the cross you showed your love for me.
In your presence God, i'm completely satisfied.
For you I sing, I dance. I rejoice in this divine romance.
Lift my heart and my hands to show my love, to show my love.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
What what?Who's my love?
And another I'll be spending without someone.
I step back and look at what I've just said,
I've never really spent any Valentines alone.
I mean,I've never had a boyfriend for any of them strangely,
But I've never been alone for any of them.
Wish for me to explain?
I have the most fabulous friends in the world.
I guess I never really noticed,I sometimes take them forgranted.
Is that weird?
Nope,we all do it all the time,like we don't totally not realize how great they are..
But we just don't give them all the love they deserve.
And realize all the times they've been there.
I want you all to know,how much I truely love you.
I know I don't always let you know,
but I care for yall more then anything in the world and I would be nothing without you.♥
If you need to talk,I'll listen.
If you need to cry,I'll hold you.
If you feel lost,I'll help guide you.
If you need to be angry,I'll let you.
If you're feeling afraid,I'll comfort you.
If you're feeling attacked,I'll be your defense.
If you need to lean a while,I'll give you a shoulder.
If you're feeling unsure,I'll be your confidence.
If you're feeling alone,I'll be the friend who won't leave you.
If you need to learn to trust again,I'll prove to you that you can.
A friend is someone,
who can see the truth and pain in you,
even when you're fooling everyone else.
When we first talked to each other,I knew we would always be friends.
Our friendship has kept on growing and I will be here for you till the very end.
You listen when I have a problem,and help dry the tears from my face.
You take away my sorrow and help put happiness in it's place.
We can't forget the fun we've had,laughing till our faces turn blue,
Talking of things only we find funny.
People think we're insane,oh if only they knew.
I guess this is my way of saying thanks,
For catching me when I fall,
Thanks again for being the friends who were here with me through it all.
You're the friend I know I can act like a complete idiot with,
and no matter what,you will stand there laughing with me.
You're the friend that I can get completely mad at,
and then having you stand there with a funny face completely ignoring the fact that I'm mad at you,
and just burst out laughing.
You're the friend that I can trust with EVERYTHING,
there isn't a thing in the world I would doubt telling you about,
because I trust you with my whole heart.
You're the friend who has been through rough times with me,
and we still come out standing strong.
You're the friend I would run to if in trouble.
You're the friend who has always tried to help me out.
And well,you know what?You're a person that I consider my bestfriend.
You're crazily amazing,
Maybe you're born with it,maybe it's maybelline.
I just wanted to remind you,
That I love you a lot and thank God everyday for blessing me with a friend that is just simply amazing.
So when you think there is no one,who understands or cares,
remember that I love you,and try to smile.(:
A friend is someone,
who understands your past,
believes in your future,
and accepts you today,just the way you are.
The girls that you laugh with when you're happy.
Jump on at when you're hyper.
Hug when you're depressed.
Have long phone calls with.
Giggle with about that boy.Shout sarcastic comments at.
Cry with when you're hurt.
Eat with every single lunch.
Just absolutely love too much,
Yeah those are the ones who make life worth living♥
So here's to my friends,
the ones who saw past all the people that spread lies about me,
the ones that got me through those days when I didn't even wanna smile,
the ones that told me I was too good for him.
But most importantly,
the ones who stayed true in a complicated world.
flowers will die the sun will set,
but you're a friend I won't forget,
Your name's precious it will never grow old its engraved in my heart in letter of GOLD.
A true friend,
Accepts you as you are
believes in you
calls you just to say hi
doesn't give up with you
admires all sides of your personality
forgives your mistakes
helps you
encourages you to try again
makes a difference in your life
says nice things about you
offers their support
understands you
tells the truth
never judges you
explains things when you don't understand
walks by your side
calms down your fears
shouts if necesarry,if you don't want to listen
raises your spirit.
If I could reach up,
and take a star for every time you made me smile..
I would have the entire night sky in the palm of my hand♥
Close friends that's what we'll forever be... Tomorrow, no matter where life may take me but one thing I'll feel happy about is , the kind of friend, I have found in you.
when I trip. she laughs.
when I run into walls, she pushes me into another. but when I cry, she always gives me a shoulder to cry on.
& she does that because that's what best friends do.
So,you I just wanna let you guys know,
I love you with my whole heart and have special things to tell each and every one of you ,
if you'd like to hear.
Basically about how much you mean to me.
I can't give you each your own separate one on here,
for it would be too long.
We were friends in the start,
and we'll be friends in the end,
I'll keep you close to my heart
Forever best friends.
You guys are my world,my heart,my lifeline,my love.
There for me when some crump breaks my heart,
and my home boys beat him up for me(:
While my girls give me a shoulder to cry on.
I know I'm not always there for you as I should be,
But I'm gonna try my best from now on.
It can only get better.
We all just need to spend some time together,
and remember all the good times.
So many memories,and only more to make.
Many more kodak moments.
So many laughs to share.
Hugs to give,and those smacks on the tush,where they're running 100 mph and smack you right in the butt while screaming heyy sexy momma!
And leaves a welt to remind you how much they love you:D
I love you guys!
Call me,message me,email me.
We all need to chat!!
-ChristinaConduit♥